Couples Counseling

Criticism speaks louder.

It wasn’t always like this, but for a long time now, it seems like you are preparing for a fight more than trying to talk to your spouse.

The subtle insults said in front of friends cause embarrassment and anger. You are tired of taking the blame for everything.

Walls now separate you.

“Why can’t we talk anymore? Why is it always my fault?”

The walls have become more prominent over the years. Afraid to let anything in, afraid to be hurt again. You think you are protecting yourself by keeping the defenses up, but it only pushes you further apart. The trust has been broken for too long.

Held hostage by old grudges.

The resentment and contempt have grown, putting a toxic strain on the relationship. It now seems everything repeats itself in a downward spiral.

The slightest look or a sigh reminds you of what happened all those years ago. Forgiveness seems like something you only read about or see in a movie. Although you desperately want to be forgiven and be able to forgive.

Is this sustainable?

You want the marriage to be successful. You want hope and kindness back in your home. But everywhere you look, there are problems. A scary question keeps coming to mind, “Is this sustainable?”

The problems are perpetual.

Every marriage has some perpetual problems. The difference is how we learn to talk about them, notice them, and make healthy corrections.

You won’t be compatible if you consider the perpetual problems incompatible. It’s not about compatibility. A healthy marriage is about clarity, compassion, and connection.

Couples Counseling can help.

We often cannot see a way out when we are deep in the weeds of our troubles. Finding the courage to ask for help is the first step.

When couples commit to getting help, they find each other again. They can learn to lower the walls they built.

Couples can expect to learn to set, hold, and respect healthy boundaries in therapy. They can find and receive the forgiveness they seek. With a little hard work and accountability, they can forge a healthy marriage at home once again.

Here are the 3 Cs of a healthy marriage.

Clarity is more important than agreement. We don’t always agree on things in a marriage. If we can have clarity over those disagreements, we can have healthy boundaries and understanding.

Compassion is a beautiful way of offering the benefit of the doubt to yourself and your partner. Too often, the defensiveness and criticisms cause harsh judgment. You can let go of the contempt when compassion comes into the home.

Connection comes in many forms, and we need them all. We need to feel that intimate connection with our spouse, be it emotional, physical, mental, spiritual, financial, or with parenting. A dear friend explained the connection equation as Vulnerability + Validation = Connection.

Begin your journey today!

You can find the 3 “Cs” in your home with clear guidance.

Do not wait any longer to get the help you both deserve.

Call us today, and we will begin this journey together.